Motivation

I thought I was motivated already, but today I completely renewed that feeling, and increased it's influence over me. I don't know what brought it about, maybe I have to much time to myself to think things over. Then again, maybe that is a good thing if it brings about this kind of result. The only draw back to it is that I want to accomplish every one of my goals like right now! I need to regain that incredible patience that I've always had, good things come to those who wait. I just hope I don't get discouraged from results coming slower than I would like. I know these things take time, I just have to channel this energy into a positive way and keep on going at full strength. No more complete disasters like I had Sunday, then again, with another leg day approaching who knows what will happen.

Ravenous

Wow, yesterday I had the most ravenous hunger that I can ever remember. Adding weights to my routine has really increased my appetite, I don't think I'll be able to finish the month off at my current average calorie intake. Today I had to give in and sate my monstrous appetite, but it is back to the routine tomorrow. Squats, what can I say, they are the bane of my existence. I can't imagine a worse feeling than the days following a first time doing squats in a very long time. But seriously, just have to get that first time out of the way, and then it is golden from there, they are probably the best strength gaining exercise you can do. I'm exhausted, the weekend wasn't very restful for me, off to bed.

Insomnia

My insomnia seems to be kicking in high gear tonight, work will sure be fun tomorrow. Anyways, I had my first set back in my challenge, but it was something I just couldn't resist, I'm glad I alloted a few extra days in case something like that happened. More research has lead me to rethink my strategy for the next few months, Tabata method is sure looking like a feasible alternative. The Velocity diet is also looking rather unattractive, but I read about a small tweak to it that might make it more reasonable. I still have plenty of time to implement all the necessary changes to it that I need to make, so I'm hoping I'll have the perfect plan when the time comes. Working full-time is going to take some more getting used to. I thought I liked it at first, but now with all the new things I want to do it is becoming a thorn in my side. Life is all about facing your challenges and finding ways to overcome them, so that is the way I'll approach it. Things are looking up for a nice change, hoping they stay that way.

Dreary

So the little experiment is going well so far, aside from my planned weekend cheat time, it has gone without a hitch. There has been some changes in my body, most notably the seven pounds I lost in the first five days. Haven't had a chance for another weigh in yet, probably get to that tomorrow or soon. There have been some negative changes in my body, but I don't know if I can chalk them up to this diet, will have to wait and see. Probably the most unnerving is my high blood pressure, I don't know how that could have came about. I'll go back to the doctor to get it checked again in a couple of weeks, so hopefully it will be back to normal then. The last thing I want to do is get stuck taking blood pressure meds the rest of my life. Other depressing news keeps getting thrown my way lately. It just seems like all this bad stuff gets heaped on me all at once whenever it comes. It just makes me want to be more of a hermit than I already am, which will only compound the problem more, so it is a no-win situation. I thought my weekend getaway would cast aside all my worries, but I just ended up realizing again that people are only out for themselves. At least it didn't happen directly to me this time, but it still stings even though it happened to a good friend of mine. Just goes to show that there are certain people you should not associate yourself with, no matter how good you think they might be, or how willing to change they say they are. Now it is just time to focus on my own personal problems. I hate that the way that I am makes other people sad or upset. It's not like I do it on purpose, I've just always been this way so it shouldn't really come as a surprise. I say I want to change myself, but I always revert back to my old ways, in this aspect at least. I'll just have to wait and see if I can rectify the situation.